you live and learn

The word 'live' is a strange concept. while technically science would argue we are all alive right now, we use the concept of living interchangeably, describing both the physical and abstract in a way that seems confusing and simple all at once. 

I may be living but I want to live. I want to truly live my life. 

Now do you understand where I'm going? 

Recently I've started jam packing my life with an abundance of hobbies. Skateboarding, roller skating, singing, guitar, you name it. It's comical in one sense. A fact I blow off and exclaim to friends that I'm now entering 'my hobby era'. I'm trying to find one that sticks. In reality, it's nothing really of the sorts. 

I don't really care about improving in any of them (the hobbies). The sheer act of partaking in the hobby is enough for me. Learning and doing something new, turning my back to what is routine and expected, and putting on a pair of roller skates. It's not a hobby that risks life or death or really any serious adrenaline at all, but trust me when I say it's exhilarating. 

At what point in our lives did we cut ourselves off from learning and trying something new? And not in a 'get a job', 'relationship', 'try a new cocktail' sort of way. The sort of ideas and fantasies we had when we were young - like I want to be a surfer. I'm going to go on a road trip when I'm older. 

When did we forgo these dreams? 

I've spent years telling myself that one day I'm going to start living. Yet, as the years tick by, I'm beginning to start losing hope in myself. 

The reality is, there's never going to be a perfect time. You're never going to wake up one day and be like 'aha, today is my day to start living'. Life waits for nobody. It's only up to you to make each day what it is. 

So watch me lace up my roller blades and spend my weekends doing what excites my inner child. One day my back will hurt and I'll be busy with a chaos of everyday life to even think about doing it. 

It's the unknown which I think holds a part of us all back. Yet, how exhilarating would it be to truly give in to it? To let it encompass you and rather let it hold you, hold it. 

Forgo expectations. Create your own reality – the one of your dreams. And for the love of god, live the life your childhood self wanted you too. Why not? 

O x