friendship

this post is dedicated to all my wonderful and amazing friends, you know who you are.

Friends are everything, they are the people you hand-pick in the world to spend time and share your life with.  

I've never been one that was constantly surrounded and consumed with friendship, or popularity. I always had a selective group of friends and even within them I always felt a bit more reserved or self-doubtful. Even with my best friend, I’d go through moments of fear and worry, of myself and our friendship. 

Friends are weird because they can so quickly become such a huge part of your life and just in the same way, easily disappear. They are somehow this constant part of you that can easily mean so much and also so little. I think throughout your life you are bound to experience all sorts of friends (especially in high school), and in many ways that's normal because no friendship can ever be the same; they all differ in so many ways. In life, you will be lucky if you come across people who can lift you up, make you happier and laugh uncontrollably. But you'll also undoubtedly meet along the way and at some point, be surrounded by people who do the opposite, filling you with doubts and insecurities, creating toxic drama and emotions, and these people are never really your friends at all. 

Before these past few months I don't think I had ever really understood what friendship could be or mean. It's weird because I've always been surrounded by the most supportive and amazing people, yet I guess they've always just been a part of my life that was just sort of there and my routine.  

I think in a lot of ways high school unconsciously made me more closed off towards friendship. It's easy to become obsessive about who, and how many and why, worried and consumed about popularity and being liked by all. We become utterly self-focused and concerned, that surrounding ourselves with the people around us is more self-driven, a habit rather than a need or desire. 

Now living in a world, unshackled by the high school dramas and stigmas, over the past few months, I've come to truly appreciate and realise what friendship is. It wasn't a sudden lightbulb moment, rather a culmination of thoughts and emotions which overall made me realise how fortunate I was to be surrounded by who I was. 

When you are surrounded by true friendship, facades are non-existent. There is no reason to pretend or over-exaggerate, hide your weirdness or opinions or not be yourself. 

I don't know if my sudden appreciation and mood towards my friends is a matter of me becoming more comfortable and accepting of myself, or my bond with my friends has just strengthened. It could be a case of me just starting to value what I have in my life, or maybe I'm just growing up. Whatever the reason behind it all, I'm so fortunate to be able to say I have incredible friends in my life, who bring out the best in me.

I think that everyone goes through a journey of discovering what friendship is, and perhaps I've finished mine, or am only halfway. Just like relationships, friendships can easily become toxic and it’s important to remember its two sided. Friendship is so powerful, strong and bright when you find the right people and I feel so fortunate to have been able to make life-long friendships at such an early part of my life. 

Thank you endlessly for making my life a little brighter x

OG