advice from a rookie: breakups

The other day I gave one of my friends some post-breakup rookie advice, and it inspired me to write a short piece on it, for perhaps it in some way could help more than just one person in the world.

I’ve always thought that the idea that your first relationship, or your first love could be your last is very unlikely, and in most cases, just provides false hope. 

Whilst breakups and splits can be hard and heartbreaking, I think that underneath it all, there is also hope in the thought that with the end of a failed relationship, you become one step closer to finding the relationship that will last. 

This doesn’t mean you should rush and end each relationship after the first fight, or perceive it as something that is only a step to reaching a final goal. I think each relationship shapes and moulds you into the person you are supposed to be and ultimately who you will be when you enter your last relationship. A relationship, good or bad can never be pointless or worthless, for by truly immersing yourself into it, you open yourself up to growth.  

I still don’t know if I believe in soulmates, for there are so many people in this world, and it’s likely that you have the capability to connect and fall in love with a lot of them. However, I do believe in fate, and that if it’s meant to be, it will be. 

I don’t know if my faith in fate contradicts my uncertainty towards soul mates but I’ve always told myself that whilst I do possess the power to control and alter my own life, at the end of the day, things happen for a reason. Whilst at times I may not understand or enjoy what has happened, I believe there is purpose in everything. 

To end this very short ramble of advice and hope, I want to reiterate to you all that I understand breakups can be hard. But please find light with the thought that you have so much more to come and so many more people to meet. Find light in the happy memories of what was your relationship and the thought of how much you have been able to change and grow. 

OG