the 'right' thing

As mentioned on numerous occasions, we live in a damaged world, with numerous issues and problems. It always seems like there's so much that needs to be done, and so many people fighting for change. If you've read any of my recent posts, I think it's easy to say, you get the point.

Anyways, sometimes its easy to get lost in the problems, so overwhelmed by the number of negatives that any solution seems pointless and a waste of time. And it's easy to feel so helpless when you think of all the things that aren't right, when you think of gender inequality, slave labour, global warming, gun violence, terrorism, refugees and asylum seekers, animal cruelty, body shaming, cultural appropriation... the list is quite possibly endless.

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I always wanted to 'do right', but lately I've been struggling to understand what 'right' is, or even find the strength to be able to tackle it.  On a first glance, doing right seems easy, and some may think they almost do it subconsciously. But in today's world, I feel like the notion of 'doing right' has evolved into this huge concept, in which you should be making a difference, fighting for something.

As I became aware of this, I felt like I had to pick one issue, devote my life to fighting it and almost make it my passion. I looked around me, in the media and even those in my community, and I saw people who preached about becoming vegan and fighting animal cruelty, I saw those who worked to educate others on the toxicity of plastic and the impact this has on the sea-life and I was moved by these images of students who were refuting the gender inequalities in their everyday lives.

I felt like everyone had something, a passion, or movement that was making a difference. It felt like there were so many people that seemed so put together and they were these inspiring, incredible beings who were just 'doing right' in their everyday lives. And I quite simply wanted to be them.

I wanted to make a difference, feel like I was doing something worthwhile in my life. However, the everyday struggles already felt too much, and I was struggling with the notion of how my little self could even do anything significant. I listed all these issues around me, these things that I already felt so passionate about, but the sheer endless number of these passions was exhausting and picking one felt impossible.

So with the complexities of daily life washing over me, I neglected my path to 'doing right', seeing it as something that was a task for future me, a thing I could tackle when I had more time, or sorted myself out more. I avoided the thought of anything all together, nodded along when people talked to me about the ongoings of the world and began to fall into this lifestyle of blankness, breathing but not living.

One day, I decided to start writing again because I guess I couldn't give myself a good enough reason to not and I thought it would be a good way to perhaps colour up my bland, grey life. And the thing was, as I started to write more,  these things began to pour out into my notebooks. I started, without thinking, writing about the world around me, the issues, the complexities and all the things that I had avoided thinking about.  It's a really strange feeling, but once the words were on the paper, I felt like breathing became easier, like weight had been lifted out of my lungs and my thoughts no longer weighed me down, like I had putting them out into the world gave me this freedom.

It took some time, but eventually I creeped back onto here, the blog, officially publishing 'my work' and in a small way, making it visible to the world. And with that, it all seemed to become easier. There were so many issues still, but it felt like by writing about them, I could do something, even if it was to make someone else more conscious of the issue.

And as I continued to write, I even felt more inclined to make changes in my own life. I became more confident in talking to others about these issues, bringing them up in conversation and having real-life discussions. I stopped saying that I wanted to do something and began to start actually doing things, even if it was little edits to my daily routine.

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In the end, I think that it's different for everyone, how we approach the global issues in our society. We are all easily susceptible to becoming overwhelmed, or even reclining from the issues altogether, as I did, because it can feel like a huge burden to carry. But, each person is also full of potential and opportunity, opportunity to do something, even if the outcome is only small.

I decided to just simply do something I enjoyed, and was lucky enough that it was a way in which I could also harness some of my passions about change. I'm able to talk about so many things on here, small and big and whilst it is read or seen by few, the impact it has on my life is astronomical and it makes me more confident to carry out change in the real world.

At the end of it, it's really about doing something, rather than 'doing good'. There's no point in not trying, because by doing nothing you are achieving nothing. Whilst your actions may be small and to some, insignificant, you can't argue against the fact that any action is better than none.

OG